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To change the world.

Also, saddleback.

electricpaladin: (Paladin)
Today I found myself contemplating an old friend of mine, and how our friendship ended.

His name was Scotty. He and I were good friends at New Country Day Camp, the place I spent my summers before I was judged ready for sleepaway camp (I remember the bus would pick me up by the concrete bridge over Clark Street, one that connected two mysterious concrete-walled apartment complexes that I never saw anyone enter or leave). We had a lot alike: we were both heavyset and unathletic boys, we both spent our time at New Country Day Camp doing as much arts and crafts in the shade as possible, and we were both interested in fantasy - at the time, especially super heroes. Even our super hero lore meshed well. I knew more about the ancient heroes whose stories my father could tell me, people like Superman, Batman, and Green Lantern. Scotty, on the other hand, new strange, modern heroes. People like Adam Warlock.

Anyway, for years we were inseprable, at least during the summer. Then, I stopped going to New Country Day Camp and, as these things usually go, we drifted apart.

I didn't see him again for about six years. By then, it was my first or second summer at French Woods. I met, by chance, a kid who called himself Dan. He reminded me a little of Scotty, but I didn't pay the feeling any attention. He didn't seem interested in being my friend, and I had enough friends that I didn't push the matter. It was most of the summer before one of 'Dan's' other friends accidentally called him Scot in my hearing.

I was sad and hurt of course, but most of all I remember being confused. If Scotty had become thin and popular, then I would have understood. I hated the rules, but I knew them as well as any kid who's ever been outcast. If anything he looked worse. I remember that it felt like a petty act of betrayal, senseless and stupid and cruel. I never found out why - I wasn't interested in anything he could say to me. I never saw him again.

I don't know why I find myself remembering that story. I haven't thought about it in years.

In further news, I have recieved yet another book at Kepler's that completely depresses me. It's called I'd Rather Eat Chocolate: Learning to Love my Low Libido, and it's awful. Here's the author's website.

The Good: Woman discards a masculinized perception of her own sexuality (and female sexuality in general) and becomes satisfied with her own libido level! Bully for her.

The Bad: The book is essentially a memoir of the author's journey through the maze of desire and compromise with her husband Kip - and in the end, her lack of desire = zero compromise. Joan gets what she wants, that is, just barely this side of no sex life, and no pressure to change, and Kip is just (not) screwed. Well, he gets the occasional blowjob. And she 'permits' him to masturbate to pornography.

What bothers me is the author's selfishness. She doesn't want to negotiate, she wants to get her way. She doesn't care that her husbnad is happy, she cares that his needs are met enough that he won't leave her. It's a selfish failed journey through a marital difficulty masquerading as a self-help book, and it. On top of all that, it's mired in sex differences - men want sex, women want chocolate - which I have gradually come to reject. I think it will cause as much damage as Jon Gray's Mars and Venus franchise.

For the uninitiated (ie. those not living with a sex therapist's daughter) Gray's books are I'd Rather Eat Chocolate for men. Instead of focusing on how women should get the sex lives they want and men should deal with it, Gray's books claim that men have certain needs (a cave to hide in, regular sex, room to be macho) that women should accomodate.

What is wrong with these people? Don't they realize if I compromise and you don't, that's not compromise! Don't they realize that we call it a relationship because it's about relating! I'm fairly disgusted.

The saddest thing of all - it was a special order. That means at least one poor person has purchased that book, and may be trying to use it as a guide to dealing with some issue in his or her life.

To end on a positive note, tonight Abby and I will be seeing Spiderman 3. Expect reviews! A warning: I'm not expecting much. I liked Spidermans 1 and 2, but whenever they introduce more than one villain at a time, I begin to get very, very suspicious. Color me paranoid, but Batmans 2 through godknowswhat taught me not to have much hope for multiple-villain movies, even if the franchise got off to a good start.

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electricpaladin

June 2012

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